When I started this blog ohhh 8ish months ago I did not know how accurate the name would be.
"Tiny Stranger"
I thought this was cute, referring to my stature and the feeling that I was introducing myself into this blog world; a stranger to you.
Unbenownst to me at that time was how accurate this self proclaimed title would become....
You may have noticed that the previous posts have dissapeared. I have just finished a complete computer, camera and even facebook album cleanse of all things EX, the person formally known as Chef.
Next will be the hardcopy photo ceremonial burning. Complete with sacrificial wine, dancing and wailing.
All jokes aside, I have in the past three days successfully wiped him from my social media life. I have also pushed the "why"s down and focused entirely on what is to come next. This is the most difficult part considering I had the rest of my life figured out.
In a way he has given me a gift. He has given me the opportunity to be another Jaclynn, one that I had dreamed of, the humanitarian, the volunteer and activist, the traveller.
As I find myself letting go of the person I had become and the dreams she had dreamt, I am now in the dance of life between who I was and who I will become.
I truely am a stranger to myself.
But this isn`t a bad thing.
there is so much potential in the unknown!
ReplyDeleteHonestly what you said resonates with me so much because I felt the same way when I broke up with J, like life had handed me a second chance and I had no one holding me down. I was free to do anything and everything I wanted. Its completely liberating. (scarily enough)
I just want to say I know you have the strength to make your dreams come true and you deserve to wake up happy every single day.
as shitty as I'm sure it is, honestly, its better it happened now right? you will learn from this, take away the good and leave the rest behind. Your a catch my dear, enjoy this time to focus on only you!
xoxoxx If you ever want to chat you know my #. xoxox